Husband refuses to let his 6-month pregnant wife eat a burger because she served their kids first, against his wishes: 'Now there's no burgers for you because you wouldn't listen.'

Author image for Emmy Pratt
Emmy Pratt • Senior Editor
Mar 16, 2025 8:00 PM EDT

Some families take the order in which members are served at dinner very seriously. I never really gave much thought to the idea that children should eat first, the cook should eat second, and everyone else should eat last. In my family, we were so well-adjusted and normal that everyone got their food simultaneously and waited for everyone else to get their food before they ate. Imagine that? Granted, that's pretty easy when only four people are eating, but I still don't think it should be that big of a deal. 

There are some families where the father takes umbrage if he is not served first. He thinks he is the man of the house, so he should get the Rice-A-Roni before his puny children and his wife. In most families, even if there is not a strict hierarchy, it's not uncommon for the mom to be the last to eat. 

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  • This family has their priorities all mixed up. The dad insisted that the mom serve herself before the kids. She went against his wishes, and he said that she wouldn't be allowed to eat because of that, despite having more than enough food for everybody. 

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    Cheezburger Image 10480378112
    via Zac Cain

    The image does not depict the actual subjects of the story. Subjects are models.

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    Husband says I can't have dinner because I served family first

    So, I'm(f32) 6 months pregnant so I wonder if maybe I'm being emotional and hungry. But as the title states, my husband(m32) said there wasn't dinner for me after I had helped plate good for my children.
    via trowitawaym
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    He had made dinner this evening while I took care of some work around the house and decided to grill out. There were more than enough burgers made, and I started getting my childrens' food ready so it had time to cool down. My husband told me to
    via trowitawaym
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    get my own plate first but I told him I'd rather not have my food get cold while the kids wanted their food. I finally grabbed a plate for myself after serving the kids and my husband said, "well now there's no burgers for you because you wouldn't listen." |
    via trowitawaym
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    was so confused because there were more burgers on the pan. But he insisted that all of the burgers that were 'ready' were taken by him and the kids. I was already annoyed by the whole 'because you wouldn't listen' comment, so we started arguing. I
    via trowitawaym
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    walked away since he claimed 'there wasn't food for me' and didn't want things to escalate in front of everyone. He followed me to the other room and blamed me for ruining dinner. I
    via trowitawaym
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    Cheezburger Image 10480378368
    via Jason Briscoe

    The image does not depict the actual subjects of the story. Subjects are models.

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    asked why none of the burgers at the table were for me and he kept repeating he told me to get my food first. I was getting sick of the fight and called him an a hole and he walked away and had dinner without me.
    via trowitawaym
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    The reason I'm asking if AITAH is because I wonder if I should have just ignored his comment and got a burger from the tray. I also feel a little bad for walking away from the family dinner, especially since I am hungry. But I'm more mad/hurt that he started talking to me like I was a child. And even
    via trowitawaym
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    if there weren't enough burgers(which isn't true), why wouldn't he offer me his? It seems like he was looking for a fight. But maybe I'm the one over analyzing things and I should just grow up and eat dinner on my own and at least apologize for calling him an a h le.
    via trowitawaym
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    Tldr: my husband got mad because he says that I wasn't listening to him, I'm mad that he was being ride to me. Aitah?
    via trowitawaym
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    Cheezburger Image 10480378624
    via Getty Images (Unsplash+)

    The image does not depict the actual subjects of the story. Subjects are models.

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    UPDATE for those with questions: •Despite my husband's comment, he was not stopping me from eating. There were enough for us all to have seconds. I chose to walk away. •I was serving the kids first because I wanted some peace while eating my food that would hopefully be warm and not cold. Earlier in the day my
    via trowitawaym
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    husband had a reaction to something and had taken antihistamines. He insisted on making dinner still and at one point as the day went on he said he was feeling dizzy. I told him to sit down and offered to serve what was cooked because I assumed he wasn't feeling well and wanted to help. He says he was telling me he had it and was frustrated that I didn't hear him, apparently.
    via trowitawaym
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    He has apologized but I think we have more to discuss. I appreciate those who have offered support and advice. I am treating myself tonight.
    via trowitawaym
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    Cheap Paint8709 Which one of your kids was supposed to NOT get burger if you grabbed yours first? a
    via Cheap_Paint8709
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    trowitawaym OP That's exactly it. No one would have been without a burger. There was enough for everyone.
    via trowitawaym
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    iamjonjohann So, where did your burger go? Did someone have multiple burgers? None of this makes sense to me.
    via iamjonjohann
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    trowitawaym OP It didn't go anywhere. His comment came across as "you missed your chance" but that was bs. We had more I could have grabbed. I didn't eat one at that point because I was pred.
    via trowitawaym
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    okaylighting So you're saying there were plenty of leftover burgers, he just decided you weren't allowed to have any? He's definitely treating you like a child, but even for a child that's ab ive. Who tf thinks it's okay to deny a spouse/child a meal at dinner time? Spouses shouldn't punish each other.
    via okaylighting
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    iamjonjohann Okay, I got it. Yeah, if that's the way your husband treats his pregnant wife... that's pretty gross. And you gotta eat, even if you're mad, lol.
    via iamjonjohann
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    GetTheSweetSpot You should have just grabbed the burger and started eating. The math doesn't change if it's already done. He's just an a hole and you're too avoidant to do anything. This marriage is on the rocks for sure. I can't believe he told his pregnant wife she can't eat. He's a punk a b
    via GetTheSweetSpot
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    trowitawaym OP I feel validated. I was blaming pregnancy hormones on how pred I am, but I feel it's justified.
    via trowitawaym
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    rememberimapersontoo maybe he is using "pregnancy hormones" as an excuse to treat you like sh and then invalidate your feelings about it
    via rememberimapersontoo
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    thedehr 17h ago Your husband is a idiot. I'll tall you what happens at any meal I've ever been to with any of my family and at my own house. The kids and wife make their plates first. Doesn't matter how long it takes or what's going on. If there's an argument about anything, it's about getting the women to make their plates. After that the men eat. Men don't eat until everyone else has theirs. Your husband is an a h_le.
    via thedehr
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    throwawayqweeen he just wants to punish you for not mindlessly following his orders. i would order food and next time he decides to cook say you don't want any because you don't trust him to not hold it over your head and boss you around. he wants to feel like the big man he has to actually provide. NTA by the way. yeah you could have kept quiet to keep the peace but that would enable his filthy childish behaviour.
    via throwawayqweeen
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    trowitawaym OP I will probably do that in the future. I just can't tell if the amount of anger I'm feeling over this stupid fight is hormones or being hangry.
    via trowitawaym
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    midwestmusician Bro f this guy. 6 months pregnant?! He should have cooked your food FIRST, sat you down and served YOU. NTA.
    via midwestmusician

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family drama pregnancy kids wife hamburgers reddit story husband grill dinner family pregnant family dinner Reddit burgers hamburger children
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